So today was day numero dos of my pound-shedding plan. I worked my ASS off! Pardon my language, but I don't know how else to express what happened in my living room this morning. I sweated. I growled. I cried. I got angry. And it all seemed to work for me! When I wanted to give up, I pushed harder, telling myself that I always give up on everything. Not this time, Miss Cupcake. No, ma'am. You will finish what you started.
So when I was lying on the floor between sets of crunches, thinking about planting my squishy butt back on the couch, I gave myself that little pep talk and started doing crunches again. I worked through the pain, shedding salty tears of self-pity and counting out the reps out loud. I'm sure my children were mortified. When I was finished with my 30 minute work out, I cooled down. Then I broke down. I bawled like a baby. My thighs were shaking, my arms felt like jell-o, and my abdominal muscles were tight and twitching. I wanted so badly to give up. This is the most difficult thing I've ever done, and I realized that I can't give up. I rarely finish anything I start, and I'm not about to make being healthy another black mark on that list.
The anger in me that was released when I thought of all the excuses I've made over the last couple years about not having enough time to take care of myself, about how I was too tired, all of that anger made me push myself harder. Who'd have thought that not only would I be changing my body, but I'd be changing my mind and soul, as well? I will not make excuses any more. That's done. It's time for the new me to step into the light.
So I went through the paces of my workout, pushing my muscles through the jell-o feeling. I was utterly exhausted, but I didn't feel like I had done enough. So I did more! I jogged in place for 5 minutes and did some more jumping jacks. It was pretty spiritual hahaha!
So, if you're reading this, and you happen to see yourself in me a little, just know that you can do anything. You have to get off your butt, stop making excuses and crying about all the things you should have done. That's in the past. It's time to do what's right now.
*I fell asleep in the middle of posting last night haha, so this is for yesterday!
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